The iPhone is a piece of shit, and so is your face.

by Tironius, created Monday, July 16, 2007, with permalink

My personal hero, a man—nay, a gorilla-fighting, Santa Clause-slugging, feel-copping hero—to whom Q–Pounder introduced me with the book, The Alphabet of Manliness, Maddox, has his thoughts on pussy douchebags(1) 1. Like me. who try to get him to buy a bitch’s phone like the iPhone:

(Disclaimer: I am a pussy douchebag who wants an iPhone.)

The iPhone is a piece of shit, and so is your face.:

“You’ve probably never heard of the E70 because Nokia’s marketing team is busy finding every last dick in the universe to suck, so I’m going to do their job for them and tell you about this product. And no, I’m not being paid to do this. I’m just tired of the iPhone fanboys shooting huge sticky wads and high-fiving each other (literally) over their stupid cellphones.”